A Tale of Four Cities

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times – in other words…it was the end of 2017. Since then, I have lived in four of the largest cities in the United States. Aside from wanting to share a life update with extended family and friends, I wanted to write down a few thoughts in hopes that they may inspire someone else to make a move…or two moves…or four!

New York City

In the summer of 2015, an East Village apartment with three roommates found on CraigsList was calling my name and I answered! I received a lot of advice as a new city dweller, but my favorite tips were: “Say yes to every happy hour”, “Steal your friends’ friends”, and “New Jersey is not New York”. If you are moving to New York City, I would give you the same advice, but I would add a few extra notes – you will have to walk A LOT…in the rain and in the snow…with groceries. Yes, it is expensive, every city is expensive, but as with most things in life, you get what you pay for. When I bought my one-way ticket to Los Angeles, I thought I would never return to NYC, but as I learn with every move (and keeping with my Charles Dickens theme) – “one always begins to forgive a place as soon as it’s left behind”.

Los Angeles

Traffic, traffic, traffic. My apartment was about five miles from work and the drive was 45 minutes each way. Still, I do not regret living in Los Angeles. However, while living in LA, I made two significant mistakes. First, I chose to live alone in a neighborhood far from the few people I knew. If you are moving somewhere new, consider having roommates. Second, I was only there temporarily and I lived like it. I chose to avoid new friendships, new hobbies…commitment in general, because I knew I would soon have to say goodbye. That was a dumb move. In an age where travel is easy and accessible to almost anyone – do not let proximity limit or control your relationships.

San Diego

Speaking of relationships, getting to San Diego was like crossing the finish line for me because my boyfriend and I would finally be in the same city! But that is a story for another time. Living in San Diego is just so easy. The weather is unbeatable, there is always an opportunity to go to the beach – this city knows how to chill.  If you are an adventurer, you can be camping in the desert or in the mountains with just a short drive. If you are worried about losing that “small town feel”, San Diego is the kind of place that has a big population of people who all know each other somehow. What I mean by that is…do not make enemies or you will run into them in the grocery store when you are post-workout and looking rough. While living in San Diego, I had this growing fear that I might get bored there eventually, but fortunately, I didn’t stay long enough to find out because in the summer of 2019, we headed north!

San Francisco

After six months living here, there is still a lot for me to learn, to see, and to do in the Bay Area, but to start, don’t make my language mistakes! Say “Bay Area” never “San Fran”, and it is just BART, not “the” BART. If you are moving to chase career aspirations, you have the right city in mind. The salary boost that comes with a move to San Francisco is attractive, but remember, the cost of living takes quite the leap as well. If salary is not your mark of success, San Francisco is also very entrepreneurial. Everyone has a side hustle and they are willing to tell you about it. While we are on the topic of speaking your mind…if you want to find out if you are liberal…like REALLY liberal…move to San Francisco and you will find out where you fall on that spectrum really quickly.

All of this was a very long winded way of saying, do not be afraid of a change of address. The good thing about moving, is that you can always move back. It takes courage to conquer the fear of failure, but like the number one rule of improv comedy tells us, “if you’re going to fail, fail big”.